But they are both en route to elsewhere or nowhere. Both did some things as participants from teaching to governance but I suspect they will not be missed equally. The family that moved on will make Judaism better wherever they are. He has an AKSE education. He understands quality and will bring that expectation to the Reform congregation that he selected instead. While commitment to ritual may not be as strong, their Rabbi always has important perspectives on Judaism to impart while the congregation has been committed for decades to broad membership participation in the activities, be they worship or social.
In the book Jewish Megatrends, Rabbi David Ellison, head of Hebrew Union College, wrote the essay on denominationalism. While I thought the expression of the historical background was too cursory, he is right that we are approaching transdenominationalism. If what you want is social interaction there is a place to find it. If you want an inspiring Rabbi there is a place to find it. If engaging in communal Tikkun Olam efforts fulfills you Jewishly, there are groups that will get you there. If you want congregational peers with no Rabbi, there is a place to find that too. So each of us has a personal agenda to pursue with an assortment of options for accomplishing it.
So where does that leave the traditional congregations or Federations? Some will undoubtedly accept a smaller cohort that tells each other how wonderful they are, much as business as usual. Others will have officers and Rabbis of greater vision emerge. These are the people who can tease out the individual Jewish agendas that people create for themselves, either by asking their potential participants or observing how they already participate, and adapt programming to the person rather than expecting the public to adapt to the programming.
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