They Reappeared

Our social media blends a great resource for connecting to people with a toxic environment that has generated much public comment.  I've divorced myself from Sermo in toto.  My exploration of Twitter, which gives me access to some of the finest minds and most accomplished people, though typically as one of a quarter million followers, also immerses me with some people I'd try to avoid in person.  These do not let me choose my interactive partners.  For the same reason, I no longer read any responses to any of my public comments via Disqus, except from KevinMD where there is more of a professional bond between the participants.  

By far the largest platform, and the one dearest to me, has been Facebook.  My identified friends number less than 100.  I value it mostly to maintain contact with childhood acquaintances, some real friends, some who I've gotten to know better electronically.  To this day, I have never unfriended anyone I met through Ramapo Central School District #2.  Indeed, I have only ever unfriended one person who I knew personally, though a few who indirectly sought me out and pitched their political hardballs with too many curves.  I have declared people unwelcome, sometime in the form of a 30 day snooze but in a few circumstances, usually for being intrusive or of excessive sloganeering in lieu of the cognitive skills that our teachers aspired us to have, through the Unfollow option.  Not many, but not zero either.

I expect Facebook to respect my choice and not ask me to share my reason.  In fact, I really need no reason, though the reason is invariably annoyance to me and a more ethical one of not wanting to be induced to think of anyone I know in a deprecating way.  Alas, this week, two of the members of Unfollow Harem reappeared with the same types of initiated posts that prompted my initial opt-out of them decision.  The original action took a series of repetitively unwelcome communications, at least a dozen over short time interval.  And sometimes after failure of a snooze option to make me less sensitive to what I receive.  But once a well-considered unilateral Unfollow, which I have the capacity to reverse at any time, gets selected, my intent is permanent.

As the three notices from two individuals, with basically the same screeches that prompted my original action reappeared, my reaction was again to confirm another Unfollow.  I was not given that option.  As a solitary member among a billion or so global Facebook subscribers, I really don't have a way of fighting Facebook's City Hall or its algorithms.  I do have Unfriend, which seems an assault on my own level of tolerance, but I am adamant about remaining the master of my participation in modern social connectedness.

Reconsidering Shabbos

Since Covid-19 closed the synagogues, shabbos has been very different for me, some elements favorable, some increasingly destructive.  This has been magnified by the Holy Days.  First, I stopped driving and never used the computer or cell phone except for medical care obligations when I was working.   I did watch TV and listen to the radio, still do.  When I was working I used to go out for breakfast Saturday morning, a residual pleasure that started when I needed some alone time to study for upcoming Board Exams but remained as a respite destination for the remainder of my working years.  I stopped doing this at retirement, redirecting my mornings at the Hollywood Grill to an obligatory breakfast required for platelet donation.  When shul on shabbos morning disappeared, I didn't miss it.  I could stay home, see what's on TV, scrounge some breakfast or at least make keurig coffee.  No FB or email intruded.  I would read some, snack some.  Longer stretches, including some Thursday-Friday-Shabbos yom tovim became more of a sensory deprivation experience, leaving taste of eating as the connection to reality.  I got pretty bored, not realizing how dependent Covid-19 made me on the screen.  I still maintained scheduled exercise those days, a variant of pikuach nefesh, with an electric timer, but amid overall designated sloth, I found the chore of schlepping onto the treadmill more of an intrusion than destination or break from boredom.  And worst, I spent much of the day horizontal, some in a lounge chair in My Space, but too much on the living room sofa, or worst of all, in bed.  A reasonable 45 minute nap at mid-day became two hours, disrupting sleep for the next two days. 

Rosh Hashanah afforded me services both days, requiring 45 minutes of attentive driving each way. Even so, the absence of screens gave way to the horizontal posture again.  Yom Kippur services were more tentative due to possible rain, but they went on as scheduled.  Good thing, because I'd have gone stir crazy not eating for 26 hours at home.  Taste may be the last portion of sensation that survives these screen-free stretches.

Just as a matter of my own health, this will not do.  I am going to have to go somewhere each shabbos or yontiff.  The screen has always been suspended, but until Covid, it comprised far less of my usual day than it does now, greatly magnifying that sense of deprivation.  Going to shul occupied the morning.  Even if I didn't go, I would drive somewhere, maybe attend the West Chester University football game in the afternoon, and on occasion make a day of it by driving to Baltimore for Beth Tfiloh in the morning and some Baltimore area attraction afterwards.  What I am doing now is probably a form of false piety, not driving largely because I have noplace to go than a genuine desire to enhance shabbos.  For my own protection, this really cannot go on.  I will just have to decide what forms of exit from my house remain compatible with shabbos and yontiff.

Replacing My Pill Case

My medicines and I have not always gotten along.  The current daily allotment has been five for a while, mostly tolerated though one needs a suspension periodically and another needs an addition periodically.  One disappeared due to orthostasis, and even now with very good BP control I will still get momentarily symptomatic on occasion when I arise quickly.  Compliance has been no better than my patients' until about a year ago when a therapeutic trial with lab work convinced me that these tablets are all doing what is intended.  

It helped to create a ritual.  Just as I start every Sunday morning outlining what I want to do during the week, as a week's perspective tends to be more purposeful than a daily task list, every Sunday I place all the pills in the their plastic pill case, noting which days I goofed which have recently been negligible, and what I need to renew at the pharmacy. It has worked out well.

I don't know how long I've had the white pill case, a linear seven compartment plastic model readily available from the Dollar Store, though usually given to me by a drug rep, pharmacy, or insurer that has an interest in taking the medicine regularly.  The logo of the donor has long since worn off.  What also wore off this week were two of the seven plastic hinges that allow me to open and close each day's compartment.  I had a few others around, a yellow one in a less convenient oval that I use for travel and another similar to the one that broke, this one from CVS Caremark with the cherry red print visible from the front.  Gleaming white, unlike the broken one that had acquired some gray grunge near the recesses of the embossed day letters.  I transferred the remaining week's pills from old to new, put the broken one in the trash, and swallowed by first day's quota.

My Kitchen Table

My kitchen depends on flat surfaces.  Around the perimeter:  a microwave which the instructions say not to pile things upon but shelves beneath, a plastic file cabinet, a wire cabinet, a rolling wooden island, counters in an L-formation, our refrigerator's top, a wooden cabinet in a nook, and a yellow metal rolling cart.  Moving inward, we have a kitchen table, four dining chairs and one other chair.  And that's only the visible flat surfaces, not counting the floor.  Cabinet and pantry space further expand where we can put things.  And we have a lot of things to put.  These past few months I've exerted some effort to claiming the island and the counters with some success.  Inroads to controlling the table have proven more intractable.

On many occasions I have tried to recapture control of the kitchen table.  Contents of the flat surface can easily be separated:  my things, wife's things, paper, not paper.  Paper tends to be overwhelming and the project fails.  It fails repetitively.  For now, though, I have my paper in two semi-neat piles and my not paper isolated to two other segments so by setting this as a priority, with the added incentive of being able to use the table for its intended eating purpose, I may get done, but it really has to be a priority.  I tend to do my priorities.

Activation Energy

Sometimes the most petty tasks become the most irksome.  It had been my intent to shower before bed, but I watched something on streaming instead.  Then get up on time, shower, and proceed with my day.  Now, shower after my first OLLI class and treadmill effort, which makes a lot of sense.  Not that I am shower averse.  The stream of water at a temperature just right for me with a variable pattern control is usually very soothing.  I have a series of specialty skin and hair applications from medicated and non-medicated shampoos, topicals that exfoliate and invigorate, two substances specified for beards, a choice of scented body washes, a choice of bar soaps.  And after drying I have a similar selection of facial and hair options, as well as body scents to choose from.  It would seem that my shower would be a prized destination, and often it is. However, that soothing time competes with other things I could be doing instead, often things that require fewer continuous minutes to accomplish but sometimes things like sleep or eating or studying that have a payoff beyond the immediate time.  

As I become largely and indoor cat, the day starts and ends primarily with a screen, interspersed with hygiene, grooming, exercise, nutrition.  All need doing, some need sustained activity.  All need a start, sometimes motivated intrinsically, sometimes prodded by an appointment or deadline.  Like a chemical reaction, being energetically favorable still requires an investment of activation energy before the inevitable transformation can proceed.  It is that jolt to proceed that has not been as consistent for me as I might like.

The Committee Excelled

Rosh Hashanah at the Merion Tribute House has always exceeded expectations.  It is a Conservative service in that it gives women full participation and modifies the language to include matriarchs but has a complete and traditional liturgy, performed expertly by the participants.  Cost of attendance is nominal, largely to cover rental space and extra chairs.  Pulling this off from one year to the next, with one or two new participants each year, requires a lot of coordination, done by a small volunteer committee.  It moved from a challenging task to a daunting one this year as Covid-19 moved the Holy Days from the sanctuary to the screen for most congregations.  My home congregation, which does not stream on shabbos and yontiff, effectively moved the day of Rosh Hashanah to whichever day a person wants to watch the pre-recorded and diminished proceedings.  I think it is the wrong approach, as the day specified for our Festivals in Torah, read as the Festival Maftir, creates the time boundary that bestows the day's sanctity.

Despite the challenges, the Merion Tribute House Committee, opted to have a live option on the Torah specified day.  Safety required considerable alteration of logistics and minor alteration of content.  Our service was moved outdoors, under a series of canopies with folding and other portable chairs spaced at the corners of each canopy.  As families assembled, they could move the chairs to sit as a family as they would do at home.  This meant that the entire project could disappear in a downpour.  The liturgy was abbreviated to what the consulting Rabbi deemed Halachically essential.  Shofar blowing was limited to the portion assigned as a shofar service without the added blasts in the Musaf.  And in Conservative tradition, the proceedings would be streamed live for those who opted to watch from afar.

It went off flawlessly.  We arrived at the start both days, assisted with the set-up.  People who led the various segments presented their portions expertly, though sometimes challenging to hear without a microphone, which on the first day was offered only for a terrific Dvar Torah.  Outdoors had its own learning curve.  Typically Rosh Hashanah post-mortems from congregations financially dependent of the success of their presentation can expect gripes about the air conditioning.  The crisp outdoors under the canopy had very effective air conditioning.  On the First Day, the women wore coats while the men mostly had woolen talesim, which did not shield the wind very well.  On the second day, women all wore closed shoes, men were a little more layered, me with a sweater under a wool sports coat.  My seat was at the intersection of two canopies which allowed the sun to shine on my place part of the time.  Our cat knows to stretch out by the window facing south that receives the sun.  I am now a creature comfort disciple of my cat.  The direct sun felt refreshing amid a generalized chill.  And mandatory spacing of chairs greatly expanded the No Chatter Section  of the outdoor sanctuary far beyond what could be attained indoors.

As successful as the event turned out, some things cannot be replicated.  No handshakes or any other skin to skin, or even sleeve to sleeve contact.  No conversations, little chance to chat with people you've not seen for a year.  That's part of the Holy Days too.  We pray as individuals but amid a much contracted community this year.  As well as most of the participants performed, they will just have to assume my notice and my admiration.

All great initiatives begin with somebody's imagination and with a risk of not succeeding.  This committee had experience, a legacy of most things going well, a few that need revision for the subsequent year.  There's the inevitable checklist of inviting participants, notifying people likely to attend, asking for money to cover costs.  But this year brought more fundamental questions.  How important is it to protect the specified day?  Could we satisfy Covid-19 safety restrictions?  How badly do we need to serve food?  Is there an advantage to having less time at services?  Will people come?  After concluding that the Holy Days and their rituals are fixed in time, that the ability to gather Jews for worship at that time protects Judaism, then the rest becomes an assessment of logistics and of Plan B's, those elements of imagination that not all committees have ingrained in their purpose.  They could not have succeeded more grandly.

The Cheap Chef

Bringing a special dinner to reality comes a few times a year.  Seder, Rosh HaShanah, Thanksgiving, Wife's Birthday and with Covid limiting our dining out, our Anniversary.  With RH approaching, I paid a little attention to the actual preparation.  Menu comes first.  For Seder and Thanksgiving, and to a lesser extent Rosh Hashanah,  themes set a pattern. It is tempting to think that online recipes have made cookbooks obsolete, maybe they have, but I still like browsing the significant collection of cookbooks that I have acquired and will even view some from the library.  But basically it is motzi, premeal starter, salad, meat, starch, vegetable, cake, and beverage.  I try to include something that either I've not made before, or at least in a while, and something that takes more effort that I would be willing to expend were it not for a special occasion.  Then an ingredients list, review of what I have available, and circled items become the shopping list.  Meat at Shoprite, eggs at Trader Joe's, some of the more important produce at Sprouts or maybe Booths Corners Farmers Market.  Thaw what needs to come out of freezer.  Then assess cookware and appliances.

So we have Rosh Hashanah:

1. Kiddush
2. Apple + Honey
3. Round Challah with Raisins
4. Chicken Soup with Orzo
5. Escarole with Asian Sesame Dressing
6. Bastilla
7. Irene's Rice Kugel
8. Glazed Carrots
9. Apple Honey Bundt Cake
10. White Wine

Game On.

My Fellow Lost

 One of the pleasures of living in a small state has been meeting virtually all of my elected officials at one time or another, making conversation, telling what I think, and having them respond personally.  With a little luck, this may even include the next President.  The number of active dislikes approaches zero.  We elect decent people who represent a lot of views.  While everyone has been personable, not everyone has been capable.

I latched onto a contemporary last cycle, a man of significant accomplishment and expertise in health care.  We probably crossed paths, he as a senior hospital executive at a place I visited almost daily, but I did not get to know him until he ran for office.  He squeaked by in a multicandidate primary and since we really only have a Democratic Party in my district, and now largely in my state, he took his place in the legislature.

Since we share an expertise in health care, his on the financial end, me on the what happens to the patient end, our correspondence evolved, particularly in trying to address a devastating effect of opioids around our state.  We discussed this coffee and via email a few times.  My new friend also had prior experience as a community representative.  This enabled him to engage in some very direct constituent concerns from traffic lights to flooding or other safety hazards in individual developments.  

Covid-19 changed some of the personal contact.  Constituent coffee hours at the Brew HaHa on his tab ended.  Public gatherings where he could show up and mingle became fewer.  And despite his expertise in some aspects of health care, he never took much initiative on making our Covid lives easier, as these were more executive tasks of the state and county than legislative ones.

As a senior health executive, his strength was as a technocrat, something I greatly admire as a clinical maven myself.  When confronted with a choice of taking $100 now or risking it to get $200, he would go for the sure thing, which is what I think legislators should do, though executives maybe not.  His undoing may have been in his own area of expertise.  His principal legislative initiative was to have the state fund Obamacare expansion by reducing the risk to the carriers that were hesitant to enter this market.  Once the deal with state money became attractive to the insurers, they expanded availability, not massively, though importantly to the 21K citizens who benefited.  I happen to agree that those citizens who went from nothing to something benefited more than the insurers who went from having a lot to having an additional increment, though the sum expended could have been redeployed for projects that were less certain but would benefit more people.

The fellow who lost to my friend by less than 100 votes two years ago renewed his challenge, with the legislation as his issue.  I assumed, incorrectly as it happened, that people including me do not really understand the technicalities of this key legislation that requires some real expertise to assemble.  Moreover, prior to social isolation my representative had done direct constituent intervention capably.  I assumed the primary would not pose a major political challenge.

I met the opponent briefly but did not discuss issues.  He had volunteered at a Covid event.  Seemed like a nice fellow.  I wished him well as I handed him my diagnostic swab and drove off.

The election returns from the primaries had a theme.  Quite a lot of challengers prevailed and even the sure things had a quarter of the party voters opposing what I thought were popular and capable incumbents.  My friend got voted out by the man who handled my Covid specimen.  The mail in ballots totalled pretty even, but the get out to the polls turned out rather lopsided.

As I ran an errand to Shop-Rite, I turned a major intersection crammed with political signs, some now effective publicity, others visual clutter once ballots for the general election was established.  My friend's poster was the largest of the corner, anchored by two stakes.  There he was in plaid shirt, windbreaker and cap with a drill or electric screwdriver, the first to remove a sign from that corner.  Being a Senior VP at a mega institution must invite its own share of failures, not getting your way with the CEO, departure of key subordinates, or initiatives that looked great until implemented but were soon abandoned.  His stay in our legislature was only two years, but to me it seemed a very successful two years.  He did a lot for our community before and I don't expect that to end now.

Accessing TED Talks

When taking my courses at the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute during the Fall of 2019, a couple of the courses were designed around presentation followed by discussion.  TED Talks, because of their diversity and expertise, provided much of the focus, though I didn't know what they were.  Some of the speakers were known to me by reputation, all were articulate and presumably experienced at solo speeches to large audiences.  While I took a liking to them and included myself in the followup discussions, the resource remained dormant.  My Spring 2020 classes had a different format, mostly too large for meaningful verbal exchange or too lecture focused.  As Covid-19 became dominant with connection to the world primarily by screen, I again sought out some type of entry to the idea marketplace.  Zoom seminars became a destination.  And OLLI classes have resumed online in Zoom format.  But I missed the TED Talks, those presentations designed to stimulate thinking more than present factual material.  Many were experience based, experiences that we do not have ourselves but can still share.

I started exploring what has been assembled.  It's massive.  When subdivided by topic, most subjects do not stimulate me but they stimulate others.  The program allows me to select my own interests and sifts through lectures their algorithms think I might enjoy, though my own style has been more surfing and sampling, not entirely randomly but with enough curiosity to tap subjects that were really on my B-List, perhaps unfairly.  Nearly all are less than a half-hour, well within my restricted attention span.  A new addition to my daily task list.

Day Trips

Some time away from home has been a staple of my semi-annual planning.  There is usually an overnight trip and three day trips.  This cycle a variant again appears, with the overnight trip assigned to a National Park and three day trips.  I have rules.  The day trips need to be to sites, though not necessarily towns, where I have never been before and they have to be in different states.  I can probably handle a range of 150 miles but 100 seems more suitable.  NYC with the Chinatown Bus makes for an easy one as NYC has endless places I've not been before and travel is passive.  I've not done Philadelphia but should.  Running out of places in my home state of Delaware.  Baltimore and nearby Maryland has a lot of places.  New Jersey not so many.  Unfortunately, Covid-19 has closed a lot of museums and historical mansions.  Some factory tours are on hold.  Campuses that I've not been to before are only partially open with restricted access.  I don't know about wineries.  State Parks and natural wonders still offer access.  I could go fishing at one of the downstate parks or visit a nature preserve.  It is very possible to do this semi-annual initiative, though planning has languished.  Some attributable to Covid, some to me.

Long Pants

Covid-19 mostly at home this summer made me very casual.  On many days, particularly shabbos, I didn't bother getting dressed unless I had to go somewhere.  In the spring, at the start of the restricted activity, I made a point of driving someplace every day. But eventually there was no place worth going to and daily drive to nowhere for no purpose other than leaving my house waned.  I stayed home many days.  When I did venture out I typically dressed for summer: t-shirt with some type of writing, shorts, sandals.  As the summer transitions to cooler weather and more formal encounters, it's back to undershirts, long pants, and socks, though I won't package the summer wear until October.

There still aren't a lot of places worth dressing for.  Supermarket a couple times a week.  OLLI and Zoom presentations where I really only need to wear a shirt.  Maybe try to do more fishing this fall.  Maybe an outdoor shul event here or there.  Maybe I will work more diligently on my projects with a more formal appearance, maybe not.  Find out this week.

Restoring Kitchen Function

 Prosperity has afforded me a big house, all paid off years ago.  I use surprisingly little of it.  My Space has become my refuge, half a room recaptured largely clutter free with spread out desk made from Conran file cabinets and tabletop, a stereo, and a modern 55" flat screen TV.  I sleep in my bedroom, sometimes goof off there.  My six month initiatives include making it a sanctuary but one third of the way into the half-year allotted for this I've done essentially bupkis.  We eat mostly at the dining room table.  I will assume the horizontal on my living room couch and maintain some plants there, but that takes up little of the space's potential.  And then there's the kitchen.

A few years ago I put serious money, a year's bonus, to its upgrades with the intent of having it a more pleasurable destination than it has become.  Lighting and cabinets have been super.  I like the sink.  Quartz counters far surpass the original formica.  And new vinyl tile flooring and ceramic tile splashbacks make an attractive appearance.  What I have not been able to do was manage the flat surfaces which are mostly obscured with stuff at the expense of utility.  Papers, mail obscure the kitchen table.  Some appliances take up counter space.  Food that has a better home occupies the island that I bought prior to remodeling.  And the floor has too much stuff to regularly sweep and to wash with appropriate frequency.  I keep meaning to restore full utility and the fun of meal preparation that goes with it. While I do need some spousal cooperation to do this, the real barrier has been my own willingness to see the decluttering project to its completion.  Earmark this to be done between Yom Tovim and Thanksgiving.

High Holy Day Mode

This September has its events, though Covid-19 makes them different.  I've done summer travel, this time to St. Louis for my son's wedding, far from leisure respite summer travel, though I did make it to the Delaware Beaches twice.  OLLI started online, excellent first sessions each class.  However, OLLI has been a lot more than classes for me.  There is college and pro football on TV.  Cutouts of fans in the stands is kinda phony.  About once or twice a year, I like being in the stands.

Our constant may be the Holy Days.  Selichot by Zoom probably is not that different than Selichot live, as the spectator element overwhelms the participatory experience.  It may be more difficult for the college crowd which uses the midnight assembly early in the school year to renew acquaintances for the coming academic year.  Rosh Hashanah, though, is a participatory experience.  Shul may be a spectator sport not a lot different than football for many, but there are meals and greetings.  Cyberspace has been an improvement over the Postal Service for conveying good wishes over distance.  But there is no surrogate for kissing the Torah with tzitzis during its procession, or for those who only come to shul on the Holy Days, those few handshakes that will not reappear for another year if granted another year.  My congregation has established what I think is a poor surrogate for the pageant of shul on Rosh Hashanah, though to be fair they had to sift through what they though the community would find most meaningful and the halacha most essential.  My offshoot assembly will try to make things more of a personal experience, weather permitting and with safety limitations.  It's not as good as the real thing of sitting adjacent to somebody you've never met before, negotiating the crowd to get to the kiddush table at the end, or watching somebody else's kids run around, but there is much to be said for following along live in the machzor as the prescribed ritual unfolds.

Some parts of the Holy Day experience may be strengthened by the relative confinement.  I seem to be more devoted to making a special dinner, especially if the live services proceed and I can take some to my sister-in-law.  I've pondered and explored various menus, willing to be a little more adventuresome.  I find myself less focused on clothing or appearance, though I plan to wear my finest things with attentive grooming, at least on Rosh Hashanah.  No point paying for a manicure if you won't be shaking hands, though.

What I've not done, and probably should, is any study for the upcoming season.  There are all sorts of insights from yutorah.org and many other online sources that I've just not been motivated to pursue.  There will only be one brief dvar Torah at Rosh Hashanah each day.  Our Rabbi's I can watch or listen to at my convenience though I have not been a great devotee of his public presentations.  This year I should have more of an incentive to explore the Holy Day season but haven't.  Maybe check out some options on this.

Each Torah mandated Holy Day will arrive on time and conclude as specified.  The Covid-19 reality seems to make those days more personalized and less programmed.

Wedding Weekend

Labor Day weekend away, highlighted by the marriage of my son, who I must say sparkled as he became a head of household.  His friend drove 12 hours at a fast clip to be Best Man and at the reception captured in a paragraph what has made my son special.

Covid-19 took its toll on travel, keeping wedding and airline related appointments left me little leisure time except for a precious two hours touring my old St. Louis haunts as the ladies got their nails prepared and my son and best friend did something secretive.  Our hotel, in a convenient location for the wedding festivities, lost its leisure travel allure.  No pool, breakfast buffet, help yourself to coffee.  Comfortable room but without housekeeping service.  And unrelated to pandemic restrictions, not a lot of drawer space so they probably did not expect people to stay very long.  Minor time zone change but not the reason I felt myself dragging.  More likely that was from impaired nutrition.  No food until we got to St. Louis and spent two additional hours on an interminably inept auto rental line.  Then to Schnucks, the supermarket I gravitated to in the 1970's, to pick up the very munchies that I had successfully avoided bringing into my own house. Plus a bottle of wine that I gave away to the Best Man rather than open for my own use.  Protein malnutrition but not calorie malnutrition.  

Got to tour my medical alma mater briefly, though primarily the main campus, but only drove through the medical campus.  Both have expanded considerably since my days there, not as much since my last stop there five years earlier.  For a Labor Day Weekend with classes in session, students seemed sparse.  The student center, fairly new when I attended but gutted and remodeled since, seemed mostly vacant.  the mini-cathedral across the street had people.  The quadrangles had few people.  Access to the Library was by ID card.  They did not charge me for parking in the garage that morning.  As I drove further South, the area seemed less shabby, even gentrified.  My National Supermarket had become a Schnucks and there was an Islamic enclave with its own mdi-sized supermarket.  Almost no litter, but that was true of St. Louis when I lived there.

Rehearsal Saturday afternoon.  Ceremony on Sunday afternoon.  It being an interfaith ceremony, by chance the Rabbi was a fellow who we knew as a brand new Cantor who did our daughter's baby naming.  He's successfully progressed to Cantor-Assistant Rabbi at a large Reform congregation where he has officiated for about 20 years while he raised two daughters, now both young professors.  He had been a serious athlete, an accomplished javelin thrower, and maintained contacts in the sport as a coach and consultant, to say nothing of still looking fit and trim.  A lot of picture taking, both at the ceremony and later in a park at an adjacent state university.  I really needed to be horizontal and headed back to the hotel to make myself supine once photographic posing was no longer needed.  Then the reception. Interestingly, I kept my entire weekend alcohol free except for sip of my wife's beer at a brew pub.

Return home mostly uneventful, though definitely tired and in need of adaptation time.  

I knew this was not really leisure travel, as it had appointments and purpose but the Covid-19 restrictions would have run contrary to my mindset of vacation.  I would like to take a trip for the purpose of tourism or recreation later this calendar year, probably to fulfill my intention to go to a national park by the end of the year.  However, I got to experience the absence of the things I seek when I travel for my own personal escape.  I opt for a hotel with a pool, even if I am not planning to immerse myself in it.  I usually find time to splash around.  Either the breakfast buffet or restaurant breakfast becomes a day-starting destination.  Of the things absent this time, I may have missed this the most.  Taking what I want, going back for more coffee, watching the weather report of even Fox News or whatever is on the big screen TV.  I rarely have lunch except on a cruise, but take pleasure in dinner with a glass of wine or mug of beer.  Both essentially absent, or really an ordeal to acquire, this time.  

Places that I visit have sites to access, from wineries to historical sites or occasionally a beach.  While not off limits, I have come to expect other people on similar tours.  The people were not there where I might have expected them to be.  Coffee in flight had been cancelled.  Coffee at the airport could be obtained though less conveniently than I expect.  

While I am getting tired of staying home, the new location imposes a different kind of strain, one that keeps it from being that escape and indulgence that makes vacations targeted destinations in place and in time.

September Disappoints

 Normally September's onset turns my next page.  I've gotten my school supplies while on sale, son's birthday, my residents are adapting to a more seamless form of patient care, High Holy Days approach with the challenge of a Torah reading and a menu.  In more recent years OLLI begins.  College football and the Iggles take the field.  In election years I start paying attention to what the candidates stand for, though in more recent years it has really been more deciding what I stand for.  We could dispute perhaps if the demarcation day is really September 1 or Labor Day but this year feels different.

I have my son's wedding approaching.  And OLLI reconvenes but in a different form. The Holy Days will arrive too, though without me having to work on my public portion.  Instead of energized, I feel a little let down, too much time at my screens or lying in recliner or couch or bed.  Nobody around at OLLI.  Not a whole lot to harvest from my garden this year.  I seem to lack the eagerness to move along to the year's next chapter.